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Sunday, February 16, 2014

forgiveness

via A Thousand Words
In an old post, I once mentioned that I had learned the importance of forgiveness and how to just let things go. It's always so interesting to look back at what I've written in the past. I still stand by what I said. I'm pretty good at letting things go and not dwelling on negativity. But the tables have turned a little. In that post, I challenged readers to rethink some of that resentment/anger/etc. they may be holding against others. I've been thinking about it A LOT lately and realize that I need to take my own advice.

Y'all, I've been holding on to some not so great feelings for longer than I care to admit. I've been thinking about writing this post for a good while but I kept delaying it and blaming it on not having enough time (which is still true...I have some reading and work to do but it was time for this post) or wanting to post about other things but really, I was avoiding what I know I need to do. Forgive. I am definitely guilty of holding on to some anger and resentment. I was somewhat in denial about it until I realized the little things that would trigger those feelings and take me two steps back after taking a step forward.

I kept making excuses for my feelings. 
"I feel wronged" 
"It wasn't fair" 
"They weren't honest"
Then, it was "I can't move on until I've had a conversation with them and reconciled." 

What I'm coming to understand once again is that holding on to these feelings isn't affecting anyone but me. And definitely not in a good way. By holding on to these feelings, I'm letting others take up precious space in my heart and mind when they're probably not thinking twice about how their actions have impacted me. I've realized that I can't wait for the conversation, for the apology, or for a person to change but what I can do is take control of how I feel about it. 

About a month ago, we had a message all about forgiveness which, per usual, came exactly when I needed it. I've been thinking about it constantly since then but I've been struggling with the next step. This hasn't been an easy to place to reach and I know I'm still not quite where I want to be. I thought that by the time I wrote this post, I would be past it all which is not the case but I know that I'm much further than I was. So this is me accepting the challenge I gave to my readers almost three years ago.

I'm letting go.

I'm moving forward.

& I'm loving this journey called life.


We must develop & maintain the capacity to forgive.
He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love.
There is some good in the worst of us & some evil in the best of us.
When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies.
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
To be Christian means to forgive the inexcusable
because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.
C.S. Lewis
I think there are two kinds of forgiveness.
The kind that when you forgive, you're also giving them another chance
or the kind where you forgive, but move on without them.
Use them both wisely.
When you hold resentment toward another,
you're bound to that person by an emotional link that is stronger than steel.
Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.
Catherine Ponder

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